Posting to let you know that I have not been neglecting everyone for the LULZ. I have been super mucho busy and worried for the past four days or so. Last night was the first night I went to bed before 2 AM.

List of upsets:

1. Laugh For A Cure - Our charity show is tonight so we've all been running around trying to prepare for it. Also, the portion I'm directing was neglected, so most of our practicing has been gotten done this month, and last night at dress rehearsal I had to change the script because someone couldn't get their lines. *Desk* I love directing but we definitely needed more time. Next semester, when I'm on officer (Treasurer!), I will definitely be on top of everything.

2. A friend/acquaintance of mine, who is 18, is pregnant and planning on getting an abortion. If you've known me for any length of time you know I am dead set against this. She doesn't want to get one but she refuses to talk to anyone about it, so I sent her an e-mail on Facebook basically telling her as nicely as possible that having an abortion would be nothing but violence committed against an innocent, and furthermore would just be her running away fom her responsibilities. Because I mean, she made her choice to have sex. She might have been emotionally impaired at the time (she was raped--I think, she only said something once on it, in passing, so I might have misheard her), but she still chose to go to her boyfriend and have sex. (And he chose to have sex with her, too, so don't think I'm laying this all on her. They're called condoms, people. And if she was raped and he knew about it, he should not have gone near her sexually. Even if she was emotionally ready to be sexually active--which she shouldn't be in any case, she's freaking 18 years old--any of her sexual organs might have been damaged.) As far I understand it isn't the alleged rapist's baby because no one's thrown that at me as an excuse.

This is what drives me up the wall about abortion...over 90% of the time it's women refusing to take responsibility for themselves or their actions. It's different when a woman won't be able to survive if the pregnancy continues, or if the baby will be born with Tay-Sachs or AIDS and won't survive to its fifth birthday. I don't have problems with self-defense or euthanasia abortions. But the stats are out there that 93-96% of abortions are not for health and compassionate reasons; they're because a woman for whatever reason doesn't want to deal with the baby she's made because, woe, life is SO HARD. Grow up. Life is always hard. I had a cry-fest last night, and a headache to show for it, on how hard life is. But you don't see me saying, "Y'know, I think I'll skip the show, and flunk out of Astronomy and take it again next semester. I don't give a shit that our advisor died earlier this year and this is highly upsetting to everyone in the cast (including me); I barely knew him, so what're you all crying for, anyway? I don't care about who's working the curtain or moving the props or that Tony doesn't know his lines; hell, who cares if you're even off-book? I'll stop trying to negotiate with work...actually, I'll quit before I have another job lined up! And you people don't need your gifts anyway."

In the immortal words of David Bowie: "Well, all the people have got their problems. That ain't nothing new."

Okay, to be fair, pregnancy is harder than any of those things. But I look at it this way: my dirt-poor mother had her first baby at 19, married but with an absentee father and later abusive husband. 30 years later both my mom and Warwa are happy, healthy, well-adjusted, financially secure as far as we can be at this point, and looking forward to the new baby. It's not like my acquaintance is alone or doesn't have resources. Hell, in the aforementioned e-mail I sent her information on New Jersey Safe Haven, a recent law stating that you can leave an infant up to a month old at a hospital or police station without fear of legal reprisals. She can even call for information to ask about things like open adoption or resources for young mothers.

I told Shae-chan about this and she's like "she doesn't think she could give the baby up". Christ! There are mothers who can't see their children at all because they're sitting in a tank in Iraq or were kidnapped or murdered or left behind at embassies in wartorn areas in the hopes they'd be taken care of in a different country. With an open adoption the girl could see the baby any time she wants and not be responsible for it. And, what, you couldn't give it up so you'll kill it instead? Hello? McFly?

The whole mess was just so freaking irresponsible and now she's taking the easy way out of it. No matter how much she doesn't want to do it and how much it hurts her, essentially an abortion is the easy way of fixing things. She'd rather destroy the problem and rob someone looking for a child of the chance to have a baby and risk breaking her own heart, than carry through with the pregnancy and give someone the baby in an open adoption. And THAT paradigm is what is wrong with the world. We have wars because people are selfish and would rather destroy what bothers them than work peacefully to ensure the problem is fixed fairly. People are constantly running away from their responsibilities, be it keeping promises or raising a child or ensuring a just and fair government, and that's what's wong with the world.

There's a Jewish teaching that Adam and Eve were charged with being responsible for the planet, because there will be no divine intervention if they fuck it all up. This world is ours. We're accountable for happens to it while we're still on it. (And yeah I know when the sun explodes there won't be any Earth anymore but that's in 4 million years. We've got time.)

I'm ranting here now because I didn't in the e-mail, in case you're wondering. My first reaction to bad news is to be numb. Then I get really angry or sad in private, but try not to flip out on anyone else affected. So if this tone seems harsh to you, I didn't take it with the girl, so don't worry.

ALSO! I don't care to debate this above rant. This post is about getting stuff off my chest. I don't want to go into "is a fetus really human?" (it is) or "women's bodies women's choices!" (except she's destroying a fetus, not her uterus). I'M NOT INTERESTED IN ARGUING THIS.

3. Astronomy final. Worried. No energy left to rant.

4. Work 12-8 tomorrow.

5. Party on Sunday :) that I have to cook and clean for. :(